One year ago today, I dropped a bombshell on my husband. I told him that I wanted out of our marriage and that I was tired of all the arguing and constantly walking on eggshells around him. I was tired of being listened to but not heard and tired of everything being blamed on me and the kids.
At the time, I was already making plans to leave. I was getting my ducks in a row and trying to figure out a place to live and work. One of his friends has suggested the book The Love Dare and also the movie Fireproof. His dad however suggested marriage counseling. I honestly did not want to do either one of those options. I was tired of suggesting things and not being taken seriously.
So, we started going to church, started going to marriage counseling, ordered the Love Dare book, and watched the movie Fireproof. I didn’t want to believe that he was changing because there had been so many times where he would change only to revert back to his old ways.
I was and had at that point in time, mentally checked out of our marriage and also being a parent to our kids. I literally felt like both Caleb and Katherine from the movie Fireproof. I was tired of not being respected by not only my husband but also my kids, and I was tired of having to do everything all by myself.
Now that doesn’t mean that my husband didn’t do anything at all. While he did work, there were times where he was working seven as a week. So actually scheduling medical appointments was difficult. While I did help with the laundry, he did a majority of it and what didn’t get done on his rare days off, I did while he was at work. During this time, I was also homeschooling the girls, going to school myself, doing all of the cooking, and anything else that needed to be done.
I am proud of how far we have come. We finished The Love Dare on each other and started it over, we communicate more than we ever have, and Fireproof is one of our favorite family movies. While we did take a six month break from church when we moved to Alabama, now that we are back in Florida, we have resumed going back to church.
We are still praying about where we feel God wants us to live; wether that be here in Florida somewhere or out in Arizona. I have som faith based books in my shopping cart on christianbook.com that I plan on getting when we get out tax money, and I have also subscribed to several blogs that talk about faith and being a woman. I do want to become more involved in church but there are still some things that we need to figure out first as far as the logistics on that. I am also still planning our vow renewal ceremony but that has taken a backseat until we decide where we are going to be living.Tags: Alabama, Arizona, church, counseling, faith, Fireproof, Florida, Love Dare, marriage, moving, praying